I remember us being introduced for the first time, 7 years ago when I was in preparation for a performance. I remember us getting on each other's nerves then. Funny isn't it? How two individuals who disliked each other had no idea that they were the missing piece in a puzzle of each other.
I remember all the endeavours and perhaps, the word most suitable to describe, all the shit we had to go through just to be together. I remembered how happy I was when I finally found someone I could confide in, someone who probably knows me better than anyone else including myself, someone who always, always puts me first above all. I remembered how amazing it felt when we had first held hands, when we first embrace each other and the first time we kissed, as silly as it was, in the midst of strangers.
And now, after all those endeavors has passed, I couldn't be more happy that we were finally able to be together without worrying that we would be seen.
But then, I probably should have known that in reality, there are no happy endings and that trouble will always be present. After all that we have been through, a new adversity shows its face yet again. An adversity that involves no one other than ourselves. The doubt, the strength that puts us to the test of how far we are willing to hold on to one another, or simply put, the test of faith.
Truth be told, I missed those moments we used to have. We had fun, cherish those times we had together despite having to hide from everyone else. But now, when there was nobody to hide from, I can't help but feel like a burden. I can't help but feel that I'm the one weighing you down. I can't help but wonder, more often than not, if you would be better off if I just had the courage to let go, to free you from the pain that you have to endure with me.
As I once read, if you see a beautiful flower, don't pluck it, leave it be, as it will die if you pluck it. Perhaps I should too, do the same?
